Here's a quick list of what I did today:
1) Walked the entire Freedom Trail.
What, is that not enough? Come on, it was 5 miles roundtrip! Alright, alright, here are some specifics for all you details-lovers out there:
1) Took the Red Line to Boston Common, where we saw a bunch of kids running around screaming and collecting autumn leaves. At least I think that's what they were doing, but it was hard to tell amidst all the running and screaming. I then lost my 7-day bus pass, all because I ignored a homeless man who was yelling at me.
Hmm, that sounds too weird to even try to explain, so I'll leave it at that and move on to
2) Checked out the cemetery right next to Boston Common, where Paul Revere and many other famous people are buried. Here we learned that Paul Revere would never have shouted "The British are coming" on the night when he supposedly did his midnight ride (but kind of didn't really), because at that time everyone in the colonies was still British and it would have been like running down Mass Ave and shouting, "The Americans are coming!"; i.e., very strange. What he actually would have said I can't tell you, because we learned all this by eavesdropping on a guided tour and it just seems unsporting. Sorry.
3) Visited the Old North Church, where we learned that the oldest church in the country is actually in New Mexico, courtesy of a man with an iPhone who was helping to settle a debate between two North Church docents upon whom we - OK, I - was eavesdropping.
4) Climbed the 294 steps up to the top of the Bunker Hill monument which, it turns out, is actually on top of Breed's Hill. But did I mention the number 294? I just want to make sure, because that's a lot of steps. 294, to be exact.
5) Visited the USS Constitution, but didn't take a tour because we got impatient at how long we were waiting (outside, in the cold) and got out of the line. Of course, the moment we did, they took the next group of people, which would have included us had we been more patient, and we probably would have been more patient if we had been less cold. But alas. So we consoled ourselves with a visit to the USS Constitution museum instead. Not quite as experientially historic, but definitely warmer.
5) Bought cannolis at Mike's Pastry. I should tell you that before I came on this trip, I asked a bunch of friends who had either a) lived in Boston or b) been to Boston, what things they would recommend me to do/see. Pretty much every one of them said to go to Mike's Pastry and try their cannolis. I now know why.
6) Used the restroom in the Omni Parker Hotel. The Omni Parker is famous for many things, not least of which is the fact that John Wilkes Booth stayed there 10 days before he killed President Lincoln. (I'd like to say that someday it will be famous for the fact that I made a pit stop there, but chances are that's not too likely. Oh well.)
So, can I say "Whew" now? In fact, let's all say it together: "WHEW!"