Post-Dramatic July 4th Syndrome

There's nothing like coming in to work the day after a mid-week holiday. There are many things that might be better, though. Like not having to come in to work, for example. Or maybe Otter Pops.

Does anyone else remember Otter Pops, by the way? I used to love them. For me and my (many) siblings, they were synonymous with summer, which in turn was synonymous with afternoons spent jumping in and out of our pool. My favorite Otter Pop was Poncho Punch, until it was Sir Isaac Lime. Mmmmm, lime!

Hmm, something tells me I'm digressing. Although in order to digress, I suppose I would have had to have an actual main topic, and I'm not sure I have that. So I guess I'm NOT digressing, which is weird. I mean, because usually I do.

See, this type of post is exactly what happens when you come to work the day after a mid-week holiday! Ugh.

Well, the work is piling up this morning, so I'd better get to it. Before I go, I'll leave you with an important question to ponder, one which was asked of me the other day by a coffeeshop barista as he took my order, and which I continue to turn over and over in my mind:

If a pirate and a ninja were to get in a fight, who would win? And why? (Actually the barista didn't ask why; that's my little addition.)

So debate amongst yourselves. And happy post-Fourth of July!

A Thoroughly Useless Update

Where are the days going???? I can't believe it's July already. Well, actually I can because it's like a million degrees out—or it was earlier today when I went for my evening jog, which turned into an afternoon jog because I got off work early and decided to do my jog early. Does that sentence make any sense at all? I might be delirious from the million degrees and whatnot. Anyway, it's hard to think clearly when it's hot enough to make you break a sweat just from typing.

I do love summer though. Love it love it love it.

In other news, I wish I had some other news. Like a fun, interesting story to tell. But my life, though busy, has not been what you'd call "super-exciting" lately. I'm thinking of starting a new series here at the frogg files, called "The Summer Vacation I Wish I Was Having" because I can imagine there's a lot of fun stuff I could be doing, if only a) I didn't have a job; b) wasn't doing a master's program; c) had oodles of spending money; d) um, that pretty much covers it.

So, look for that series sometime in the upcoming weeks, unless of course I don't get around to it, because of being a) too busy; b) too hot; c) too lazy; d) some combination of all of the above. In which case you'll just have to make do with my normal, uninformative ramblings. Something like this post, in fact.

Til next time, here's wishing everyone a safe and happy fourth of July!

Pity The Mac Specialists At Apple Stores Today

There are many things I do not understand in life. But I really do not understand this.

Snack Attack

Well, the building did not burn to the ground yesterday, so I'm guessing everything is OK. I never did find out exactly what caused the rumor to start. I think that someone in our company had been (ironically) on a smoke break outside and saw a fire truck pull up to the curb, and drew his own conclusions. Oh, and someone else told me that they had heard running feet in the fire escape stairwell. That's about all I was able to ascertain about yesterday's possible fire. Mind you, that was still third-hand "information." Anyway, here I am again, back in the cube and not cindered. Cool.

In other (far more intriguing) news, a co-worker forwarded me an article today with the entitled "Japan's all-star speed eater suffers professional injury." If you're like me, you're probably wondering, "What sort of professional injury could a speed eater suffer?" I'm so glad you asked, because now I can say, "Just click it."

Haha, get it? It's like "Just do it", only instead of "do" you say "click" and... oh never mind. It wasn't that funny.

So anyway, I'm not going to say much about the article, but I do want to point out that the concept of eating as a competitive sport is very weird. I mean honestly, how do you "train" for it? Do you just stuff your face as much as possible every day? Or do you alternate speed training (how much you can eat in a certain time frame) with endurance training (how much you can eat, period)? Either way, my response is "gah."

Speaking of eating, I'm feeling a bit peckish at the moment, if by "peckish" you mean "STARVING." What to eat, what to eat... I can't make up my mind. But one thing I do know: the phrase "53 hot dogs" will NOT be a part of my decision-making process. Gross.

Rumor Has It

There's a rumor making the rounds of my office that the 14th floor of our building is on fire. But no one seems inclined to do anything about it, which leads me to suspect that a) this rumor is not true, or b) we will all be burned up because of our determined nonchalance.

I really hope the answer is "a" because here I am, still sitting in my cube, not being evacuated from a supposedly burning building.

In other news, I went for a jog this morning along the horse trails in my town, and ran smack into a huge spider web. Is there any better way to start the morning than with the possibility that a black widow or a brown recluse or some other equally horrible arachnid has gotten stuck in your hair? Well, in my opinion, NOT running into the spider web would have been one of those better ways. But maybe that's just me.

Speaking of jogging in the morning, I have been doing it on a fairly regular basis now over the past month, and there is one main thing that I have learned from the experience: you can train your body to wake up early in the morning, but that will not make you a morning person. Trust me.

Is It Time To Go Home Yet?

And the answer to that question, so very unfortunately, is "no." Still have an hour to kill at the office. Shall I use a machete or a rope?

Ha. But seriously, isn't that a funny phrase, "an hour to kill"? Where did it come from, the idea of killing time? If someone else would care to Google it and find out, that would be great. I'm too lazy.

In other news, I just got handed another project to proof, so I better stop blogging and start working. Boo.

TGIF

I have found a new love... it's called the pumpernickel bagel from Noah's. Mmmmm!

OK, I know. It's sad that my new love has to be a bagel. But hey, when the pickings are slim, what can you do.

In other news, my first writing packet deadline for the semester is coming up next week. Let me tell you, June 30 never loomed as ominously as it does right now. And it's pretty tough for any day in June in Southern California to achieve ominousness, seeing as how they are usually so bright and warm and sunny and all, but June 30 has done it, thanks to the fact that my procrastination skills have been in full force ever since I got back from Louisville.

Wow, that was a really long sentence.

Speaking of procrastination, I have some down time at work right now, so technically I could be catching up on my reading, or getting further along on the short story I started the other day. I could, but then I would not be procrastinating. Nor would I be writing this blog. So not only would the frogg files not be updated with the sort of important information that this post obviously contains, but I would also call my whole nature into question, because if I did not procrastinate, who on earth would I be? The implications are just staggering. Oh, what a quandarous life I lead, caught between dilemmas of duty and identity!

And if you think that sounds more profound than it actually is, congratulations! You are correct!

Sorry, my day got off to a weird start. Let's just say it included a can of Coca-Cola exploding, and I haven't quite recovered. That's the only explanation I can think of for the preceding paragraphs.

In other other news, I'm really glad it's Friday.