So, my flight has been delayed. I was supposed to leave around 9 p.m.; now I'm stuck here at the airport til midnight. Which means, I won't get to Sacramento until at least 1:30 a.m. Which means I won't be going to bed til something like 3 a.m., since I'm going to be staying with the cowgirl and she lives about an hour and a half away from Sac.
Which means, I owe the cowgirl one, big time.
Further bulletins as events warrant, or (more likely) boredom dictates.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Today
I'm tired. And sick. I have a cold and my head is heavy. Tomorrow night I'm supposed to get on a plane to Sacramento, ultimately heading up to Tahoe for the weekend. I hope I feel better. At the moment, I'm simply feeling sorry for myself. As I usually do when I'm sick.
In other news, Monday was the one-year anniversary of the date when I discovered I had a tumor growing in my chest. Sometimes I can't believe it's only been a year. It seems like it happened ages ago. And it's still hard to believe it happened at all.
People ask me how I'm feeling, and mostly I'd say back to normal. My energy levels are back, but I still haven't managed to get into a running routine that is anything like what I was doing B.C. (before cancer). I experience pain in my chest from time to time, which the doctor said was probably due to internal scarring. My hair is super-curly now, whereas before it was just a bit wavy.
I look at pictures of myself B.C. and there are times when I feel like I'm looking at pictures of a different person who bears just a passing resemblance to me. But I also feel like that when I look at pictures of myself now. It's hard to explain. As is so much about the cancer experience in general.
But as much as I still don't always know what to make of the whole thing, I do know this — I'm so glad and thankful that, a year later, I'm here.
In other news, Monday was the one-year anniversary of the date when I discovered I had a tumor growing in my chest. Sometimes I can't believe it's only been a year. It seems like it happened ages ago. And it's still hard to believe it happened at all.
People ask me how I'm feeling, and mostly I'd say back to normal. My energy levels are back, but I still haven't managed to get into a running routine that is anything like what I was doing B.C. (before cancer). I experience pain in my chest from time to time, which the doctor said was probably due to internal scarring. My hair is super-curly now, whereas before it was just a bit wavy.
I look at pictures of myself B.C. and there are times when I feel like I'm looking at pictures of a different person who bears just a passing resemblance to me. But I also feel like that when I look at pictures of myself now. It's hard to explain. As is so much about the cancer experience in general.
But as much as I still don't always know what to make of the whole thing, I do know this — I'm so glad and thankful that, a year later, I'm here.
Sunday, February 07, 2010
Brief Meditation On A Line From Hopkins
Today I went for a walk. I saw a trail I'd never taken before, and followed it to a street I didn't know. For some reason, a single line from a poem began to run through my head: The world is charged with the grandeur of God.
The word "charged" means many different things, of course. You can be charged in the sense of being accused of something. You can be charged in the sense of being entrusted to carry out a task or duty. When you charge a battery, you cause it to store energy drawn from another power source.
I looked around.
There were a scattering of pink petals on the sidewalk, fallen from a flowering bush that stood taller than I ever will. Water drops on the petals winked back at the sun.
There was a tree with some kind of berry hanging from its branches. Large dark berries, like a cross between blueberries and olives, cast in silhouette against a golden light.
There were long swathes of grass growing out of the soil next to the sidewalk. Water drops on the grass sparkled like diamonds. I stopped, crouched down, stared, ran my fingers along the thin green blades. The diamonds melted away the moment I touched them. But everywhere I looked, there were more. If God so clothes the flowers of the fields, I thought.
The world is generous with its riches. God is generous with the world. And yes, the world is charged with His grandeur. In every sense of the word.
The word "charged" means many different things, of course. You can be charged in the sense of being accused of something. You can be charged in the sense of being entrusted to carry out a task or duty. When you charge a battery, you cause it to store energy drawn from another power source.
I looked around.
There were a scattering of pink petals on the sidewalk, fallen from a flowering bush that stood taller than I ever will. Water drops on the petals winked back at the sun.
There was a tree with some kind of berry hanging from its branches. Large dark berries, like a cross between blueberries and olives, cast in silhouette against a golden light.
There were long swathes of grass growing out of the soil next to the sidewalk. Water drops on the grass sparkled like diamonds. I stopped, crouched down, stared, ran my fingers along the thin green blades. The diamonds melted away the moment I touched them. But everywhere I looked, there were more. If God so clothes the flowers of the fields, I thought.
The world is generous with its riches. God is generous with the world. And yes, the world is charged with His grandeur. In every sense of the word.
Wednesday, February 03, 2010
A Laid-Back, Totally Non-Road Ragey Note To Drivers In L.A., Yo
The following is a public service announcement from your friendly neighborhood frogg.
To those who are going below 65mph on the freeway, please take a moment to look at the posted speed limit signs. You'll be able to read them just fine because no way are they going to be a blur at the rate you’re going. So you will see that they say 65mph. Consider what this may mean, not just for you, but for everyone on the road with you. Especially those who are stuck in the huge line of cars stacking up behind you in the fast lane. Which, by the way, you shouldn’t be in.
To those who are going exactly 65mph, you may be interested to know that you have a 5mph leeway. This is not written in any "official laws" per se, but we all know it. Except you. Until now.
To those who are conscientiously going 5mph above the posted speed limit, please take a moment to get out of the fast lane. You’re going too slow.
To everyone using the L.A. freeway system — the fast lane is the one on the LEFT.
I realize all this may sound a little more like a diatribe than a public service announcement, but I don't care.
Thank you for tuning in. Back to your regularly scheduled day now. With kisses, of course, from the frogg princess.
To those who are going below 65mph on the freeway, please take a moment to look at the posted speed limit signs. You'll be able to read them just fine because no way are they going to be a blur at the rate you’re going. So you will see that they say 65mph. Consider what this may mean, not just for you, but for everyone on the road with you. Especially those who are stuck in the huge line of cars stacking up behind you in the fast lane. Which, by the way, you shouldn’t be in.
To those who are going exactly 65mph, you may be interested to know that you have a 5mph leeway. This is not written in any "official laws" per se, but we all know it. Except you. Until now.
To those who are conscientiously going 5mph above the posted speed limit, please take a moment to get out of the fast lane. You’re going too slow.
To everyone using the L.A. freeway system — the fast lane is the one on the LEFT.
I realize all this may sound a little more like a diatribe than a public service announcement, but I don't care.
Thank you for tuning in. Back to your regularly scheduled day now. With kisses, of course, from the frogg princess.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
M&M Overdose Imminent—Intervention Please!
OK, seriously, I think I am addicted to M&Ms now.
I blame my roommate (in, of course, the nicest possible way). She came home the other day with a giant plastic tub filled to the brim with M&Ms—a prize she had won at an anniversary party for some friends of hers. So maybe I should actually blame her friends. Anyway, there are enough M&Ms in there to last til Doomsday. Or whenever North Korea decides to fire their rockets at us, whichever comes first.
Er, wait.
Whatever, the point is, I can't manage a simple walk through the dining room without taking a scoop of M&Ms out of the little glass bowl that sits on the table. Or sit in the living room without having a few—or a few too many—out of another glass jar on the coffee table. I can't even eat oatmeal anymore. I mean, by itself.
On the other hand, I've been wondering what to give up for Lent this year. Maybe I have my answer.
I blame my roommate (in, of course, the nicest possible way). She came home the other day with a giant plastic tub filled to the brim with M&Ms—a prize she had won at an anniversary party for some friends of hers. So maybe I should actually blame her friends. Anyway, there are enough M&Ms in there to last til Doomsday. Or whenever North Korea decides to fire their rockets at us, whichever comes first.
Er, wait.
Whatever, the point is, I can't manage a simple walk through the dining room without taking a scoop of M&Ms out of the little glass bowl that sits on the table. Or sit in the living room without having a few—or a few too many—out of another glass jar on the coffee table. I can't even eat oatmeal anymore. I mean, by itself.
On the other hand, I've been wondering what to give up for Lent this year. Maybe I have my answer.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
The Breakfast of Champions...
...can get a little old after a few days in a row.
Not that I would know from personal experience or anything.
In other news, I'm off for a hike near Malibu today. A much-needed opportunity to get outdoors and clear the brain after a tough week. Hope you all have a wonderful Saturday! With love, as usual, from the frogg princess...
Not that I would know from personal experience or anything.
In other news, I'm off for a hike near Malibu today. A much-needed opportunity to get outdoors and clear the brain after a tough week. Hope you all have a wonderful Saturday! With love, as usual, from the frogg princess...
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Oatmeal + M&Ms
= the breakfast of champions. Strange champions, perhaps; quirky champions that you almost kind of wonder if you should maybe worry about their mental health, but champions nonetheless.
Although I should clarify: you have to actually put the M&Ms in your oatmeal to qualify. Besides, if you don't, you won't see how many pretty colors your oatmeal can turn, and then what fun is it?
I'm going to go now.
Although I should clarify: you have to actually put the M&Ms in your oatmeal to qualify. Besides, if you don't, you won't see how many pretty colors your oatmeal can turn, and then what fun is it?
I'm going to go now.
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